Dear God,

Father, I feel so sad in my heart right now. I feel like it is hard for me to concentrate on doing anything else because I'm wrapped up in my thoughts. Here I sit at work, and it's the holidays - so many people are at home, and I am here.

I pray for your help, God. I really need it now. I've lived for so long, wrapped up tight, and now I'm trying to deal with my damaged emotions and such. I'm used to coping with stress a certain way - a damaging way - and I want to do what is right. I feel scared, God, and anxious, because I'm having to relinquish control. I'm used to coping with stuff in a way that enabled me to stay in control, yet it's been unhealthy. I really need help in expressing the anger I feel.

I feel like I'm looking at myself from within and from without simultaneously. The me on the outside wants the me on the inside to hurry up and get out. The me on the inside - I say this with tears in my eyes - wants to come out, but is afraid of getting hurt in the process. I want to do what is right, and I want to be deeply spiritual, to be effective spiritually.

I want to serve you wholeheartedly. I don't want to be caught up in sin. Please help me to see your grace and mercy, O God! Please draw me out so that I can be healed by you! Yes, heal my broken heart! Hold me, God!